REGRETS YOU WOULDN'T WANT WHEN YOU TURN 40!

Stop wasting time regretting what you did a year ago.  Start doing what you have to do now, so that in a year’s time you won’t regret what you did today.

I turned 40 last week and I decided to celebrate quietly doing what I love doing best, GIVING to meaningful people who matter to me! No there wasn’t any party, there wasn’t any destination party either and there wouldn’t.

You only get to be 40 once and I am 40 already last week…

Years ago, I stumbled on a book that opened up my eyes and made me question myself, “NKY WHAT WILL BE YOUR STORY OR ACHIEVEMENTS WHEN YOU TURN 40?”

I pondered and decided to rearrange my life! I ASKED MYSELF WHAT ARE THE REGRETS I SHOULD AVOID OR MAKE AMEND, then I wrote 40 points down and followed it religiously until it became a part of my today!

Oh 40, the big number most girls are either excited about or not excited at all!

⇒ AT 40, ” YOU ARE EITHER A FOOL OR REMAIN A FOOL FOREVER IF YOU DON’T GET YOUR ACTS RIGHT”.

⇒ AT 40, YOU SHOULD BE THINKING OF YOUR FUTURE AND FUTURE OF YOUR GENERATION.

⇒ IF AT 40, YOU ARE STILL CARRIED AWAY BY THE THINGS OF THE WORLD, THEN YOU HAVE A LONG LONG WAY TO GO!

⇒ AT 40 YOU SHOULD BE ASSOCIATED WITH THE RIGHT THINGS AND PEOPLE… NOT PEOPLE THAT LIVE THEIR LIVES TRYING TO IMPRESS OTHERS UNNECESSARY.

⇒ 40 IS NOT A TIME TO INVEST IN DESIGNER SHOES, BAGS ETC.

⇒ IT’S A TIME TO INVEST FOR YOUR CHILDREN AND THEIR FUTURE!

After pondering on these, which I personally considered as facts, I decided to write these points down.

REGRETS I WOULDN’T WANT ONCE I TURN 40 and above!

⇒ Spending too little time with the right people. – …Sooner or later, you just want to be around the people who make you smile.  So today, spend time with those who help you love yourself more.  And remember, the people you take for granted today may be the only ones you need tomorrow.  Never be too busy to make time for those who matter most. And also there is no reason you should be around individuals who don’t celebrate you. People who don’t believe in your dreams!

⇒ Not making your loved ones smile more often. – The most beautiful thing is to see a person you love smile, and even more beautiful is knowing that you are the reason behind it.

⇒ Not saying what you need to say. – Speak up. Don’t hide your thoughts and feelings, especially when you can make a difference. Be brave. Say what needs to be said.  If you care about someone, tell them.  Hearts are sometimes broken by the words we leave unspoken.

⇒ Constantly comparing yourself to everyone else. – Don’t compare your progress in life with that of others.  We all need our own time to travel our own distance. It’s perfectly OK to be different. Today, the only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday. Prove yourself to yourself, not others.

⇒ Ignoring your intuition for too long. – Sometimes your mind needs more time to accept what your heart already knows. Breathe. Be a witness, not a judge. Listen to your intuition.

⇒ Not taking action on meaningful goals. – Instead of complaining about your circumstances, get busy creating new ones. You either suffer the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. Most of the time, the only difference between who you are and who you want to be, is what you do.

⇒ Letting others talk you out of your dreams. – Can you remember who you were before the world told you who you should be? Stop living for other people and their opinions. Be true to YOU.

⇒ Vivid memories of wasted time. – There is good reason why you should wake each morning and mindfully consider what and who you will give your day to.  Because unlike other things in life – love, money, respect, good health, hope, opportunities, and many more – time is the one thing you can never get back once it’s gone.

⇒ Collecting more excuses than you can count. – If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse.

⇒ Waiting, and waiting, and waiting until you’re ready. – Sometimes life seems hard, but we often make it harder than it is.  All you ever have to decide is what to do next. It really is this simple. You don’t have to have it all figured out to move forward.  Just do the best you can until you know better.  Once you know better, do better.

⇒ Not putting in enough effort. – In life you are either a passenger or a pilot, it’s your choice.  If you want something, work for it.  Do what it takes, not what is easy.  It will hurt.  It will take time.  It will require dedication.  It will require willpower.  You will need to make healthy decisions. It requires sacrifice. You will need to push your body to its max.  There will be temptation. But, I promise you, when you reach your goal, it will be worth it.

⇒ Letting solvable problems stop you. – Not everything that’s faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it’s faced.  Problems are not stop signs, they’re guidelines.  If you want it, work for it.  It’s that simple.  Strength doesn’t come from what you can do. It comes from overcoming the things you couldn’t.

⇒ Not taking on enough risk. – Wouldn’t you rather have a life of “OH WELLs” than a life of “WHAT IFs”?  Do what you can while you can.  Don’t be afraid to move out of your comfort zone. Some of my best life experiences and opportunities came to me only after I dared to lose.

⇒ Settling for less than you are capable of. – Remember, growth and change may be painful sometimes, but nothing in life is as painful as staying stuck where you don’t belong.

⇒ Putting your own needs and happiness on the back burner. – All jokes aside, your life only comes around once.  This is IT.  So do what makes you happy and be with whoever makes you laugh, often.

⇒ Letting impatience govern your decisions and actions. – Patience is not about waiting; it’s the ability to keep a good attitude while working hard for what you believe in.

⇒ Giving up too soon. – Forget how many times you’ve broken down.  It’s about how you stand up and move on.  You may have to go through the worst, to get to the best.  Good things take time.  Stay patient and stay positive.  Everything is going to come together; maybe not immediately, but eventually.

⇒ Letting someone walk all over you, and infinitum. – Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.  And walk away from anyone who continually robs you of peace and joy.  Life is too short to waste your time with people who abuse and bully you.

⇒ Not helping others when you were able. – If you have a lot, give your wealth.  If you have a little, give your heart.  Just give what you can.  No one has ever become poor by giving.

⇒ Ignoring your roots and those who have supported you. – Never forget where you’ve been.  Never lose sight of where you’re going.  And never take for granted the people who travel the journey with you.

⇒ Not appreciating what you have when you have it. – We often forget that happiness doesn’t come as a result of getting something we don’t have, but of deeply appreciating what we do have.  No, you won’t always get exactly what you want.  But remember this: There are lots of people who will never have what you have right now.

⇒ Letting your health go. – Your body is the only place you will truly ever live.  If you’re lucky enough to have a body that’s in good health, be wise enough to keep it that way.

⇒ Years of struggling to find happiness outside yourself. – Happiness is not determined by what’s happening around you, but rather what’s happening inside you.  Too many people depend on others, or outside sources, to gain happiness, but the truth is it always comes from within.

⇒ Letting too many plans blind you from the beauty of now. – When life is good, enjoy it.  Don’t go looking for something better.  Happiness never comes to those who don’t appreciate what they have.  You must be willing to loosen your grip on the life you have planned so you can enjoy the life that is waiting for you now.

⇒ Being too narrow-minded to see the opportunities given to you. – Sometimes life doesn’t give you what you WANT because you NEED something else.  And what you need often comes when you’re not looking for it.

⇒ The limitations you put on yourself. – It’s often our own thinking that hurts us.  There’s no reason to imprison yourself.  Don’t think outside the box.  Think like there is no box.

⇒ Letting negativity get the best of you. – Remember, true strength is when you have so much to cry and complain about, but you prefer to smile and appreciate your life instead. Never admitting and growing beyond your mistakes. – You can learn great things from your mistakes when you aren’t busy denying them.

⇒ Not accepting responsibility for life changes you need to make. – If you’ve been asking the same questions for a long time, yet are still stuck, it’s probably not that you haven’t been given the answers, but that you don’t like the answers you were given. Remember, it takes a great deal of courage to admit that something needs to change, and a lot more courage still, to accept the responsibility for making the change happen.

⇒ Seeking too much validation from others. – You are GOOD enough, SMART enough, FINE enough, and STRONG enough.  You don’t need other people to validate you; you’re already valuable.  You are YOU and that’s the beginning and the end – no apologies, no regrets.

⇒ Impressing the wrong people. – Not everyone will appreciate what you do for them.  You have to figure out who’s worth your attention and who’s just taking advantage of you.  Spend more time with those who make you smile and less time with those who you constantly feel pressured to impress.

⇒ Time spent on drama and needless arguments. – Life is too short to argue and fight.  Count your blessings, value the people who matter and move on from the drama with your head held high.

⇒ Letting a grudge hurt your happiness. – Let it go.  Grudges are a waste of perfect happiness.  Holding one is like letting unwanted company live rent free in your head.

⇒ Endlessly worrying about things. – Move on.  Stop letting it bother you.  If a problem can be solved, there’s nothing to worry about.  If it can’t be solved, worrying is useless.

⇒ Forcing what’s not meant to be. – Never force anything.  Do your best, then let it be.  If it’s meant to be, it will be.  Don’t hold yourself down with things you can’t control.  Sometimes you have to stop worrying, wondering, and doubting.  Have faith that things will work out, maybe not how you planned, but just how it’s meant to be.

⇒ Getting stuck in the trap of consumerism. – Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t need, to impress folks they don’t even know.  Don’t be one of them.

⇒ Never travelling when you had the chance. – Once a year, go somewhere you’ve never been before.

⇒ Not choosing to laugh at life more often. – Life is way better when you’re laughing.  Being positive in a negative situation is not naive, it’s a sign of leadership and strength.

⇒ Resisting change instead of rolling with it. – You’re not the same person you were a year ago, a month ago, or a week ago.  You’re always growing.  Experiences don’t stop.  That’s life.

⇒ Talking the talk, but never walking the walk. – When it’s all said and done, be sure you haven’t said more than you’ve done.  In the end, actions always speak louder than words.  So work hard in silence, and let your success be your noise.

May God grant us understanding!
Remain blessed and have a lovely weekend.

34 thoughts on “REGRETS YOU WOULDN'T WANT WHEN YOU TURN 40!”

  1. I stumbled on this and it took me a long time to finish reading. I know it would have taken you a while to write it down. Thx for sharing this wonderful thoughts.

  2. Wow! having to know this before I turn 40 is an eye opening n blessing .Thanks so much for sharing this.God bless you n continue to keep you.

  3. NK, you have impacted so much in me, far beyound your imaginations and all I can say is God bless u, keep u and continue to use you to minister to people around u and across the world.

    You are truly amazing!

  4. God bless you for this write up,going. Be 40 in 6yrs and I have gotten a few points and will actually frame mine and leave it hanging in my room, will do my to achieve 8 out of 10 goals because God knows best.

  5. This write up has really blessed me. I need to set out my goals as i will be 40 next year. God bless you my sister, you always motivate me everytime n everyday i read you write ups. You a a rare gem!

    1. God bless you too Ayodele! It’s God’s grace o! Setting the goals is a very good idea, it will prepare you and allow you to enter the next stage of your life fully prepared. Thank you for stopping by too!

  6. Your write up really inspired me, I turned 40 in march this year, since then I have been thinking of how to mentor young women coming after me.

  7. Thank u Ma. Am printing dis n pasting it on my wall to serve as my daily meal to help me picture my future frm now. Hmm u r a blessing, I desire to meet u Ma. God give u more wisdom n grace.

  8. Thanks for this write up though I stumbled on it very late (a year after); in my early 50’s now I’ve tried to achieve some of it. God bless you & loving every bit of the NHN Empire. I’ll definitely stop by when I’m in town.

  9. Love this write up and I read twice am going to be 40 in few weeks, it’s time to take stock or ones life. You are blessed love your works too.

  10. thank God for ur life ma.I will be 40 by next year.I knw dat is not too late for me to make and accept changes.with this inspiration I wil work hard to make a better end.thanks n may God continue to bless n see NHN couture through.

  11. Wow! This piece is really loaded, thanks a lot for sharing this – no one is an island of knowledge. 40 is just close by and it sure makes great sense to start living out this way!

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